Neighborknitter

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Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Knitting Notes

"...And I've looked over, and I've seen the promised land. I may not get there with you, but I want you to know tonight that we as a people will get to the promised land. So I'm happy tonight. I'm not worried about anything. I'm not fearing any man." Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

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There is knitting going on here.



See? Knitting. Mind you, these socks haven't exactly been the easy, free-flowing experience I expected from the pattern's title "Super Easy Sock." I was lured in by the single page of directions. One page! Ha! I can do THAT. Not until I came to the bottom of the page and had only half a sock to show for it did I realize I needed to remove the pattern from its plastic protector and turn it over, only to discover- another full page of direction! In a less generous moment, I was tempted to call the pattern writer "Super Stupid."

The cuff went great, perfectly, and so I was awash with SGS (Smug Girl Syndrome). If all a sock required was a cuff, I'd be a sock expert. Leg warmers are my beat. I'd have been a big hit in the eighties. Unfortunately the foot and toe of the sock came into play somewhere around the "turning the page over" portion of the program. To skip this aspect of said sock, I felt, might have been noticeable.

I thought I was doing well. Mrs. Knotty, a Sock Guru, started me on the heel and that went along just fine for nearly five minutes. Then confusion set in and I turned to Knitty Yoda who had just joined the group. At that exact same moment in time, something went awry in the Manners portion of my brain. I blame the fiddly DPN's.

Knitty Yoda went through careful, clear instructions with me, took the sock from my hands and demonstrated what to do, returned it, and watched as I picked up stitches and tried to work around. She was the picture of patience and encouragement.

Knitty Yoda (encouraging): That's it! You're doing great.
Me (shoulders slowly coming down from around my ears): Whoo-hoo! This is smooth sailing now.
Knitty Yoda (reasonably): Well, until you get to the toe.
Me: Shut up.
Me: Did I just tell you to shut up?
Me: Did I just tell a pregnant woman to shut up?
Me: WHAT is happening to me?

So socks, thus far, are not my best feature. I have foolishly joined a Sockret Pal, which includes a secret pal swap of goodies for the next few months and, as the Big Finish, an exchange of knitted socks. Perhaps not the best decision I've made lately, considering I'm yet to complete a pair of socks. I read the words "This will be a bi-monthly swap - meaning you will send out (and receive!) a package once every 2 months" and got all giddy with the idea of presents- for me!- in the mail! Before you could say "Stick me in the eye with a double pointed needle!" I had sent in a request to join and had been accepted. So I WILL, I MUST finish.

I expect sending a pair of Hanes would go down poorly.

3 Comments:

Blogger Renee said...

Hanes are out of the question!

My and Yoda have some interesting discoveries about the "Pick Up and Knit" directions. Turns out we were both right. Come see us sometime when you're not being "personable" at the yarn store. I'm home almost every afternoon while Sarah naps! Yoda has my number if you want to call before I see you again to give it to you.

9:30 PM  
Blogger Renee said...

That should've been "ME and Yoda"

9:31 PM  
Blogger Ann said...

Man - when did you post all of this stuff?!? Have I been in a weird time warp? I would say I check your blog everyday, but- maybe some pregger hormones are fiddlin' with my brain.
I think your socks look great - anyone should be happy to receive them!

3:12 PM  

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